The Worst Friends

AI Generated (ChatGPT)

This morning, I partnered up with two long-time “worst” friends: Shame and Humiliation. Together we tackled the first steps toward a fit and active me.

Shame showed up right away as I posed for the dreaded front, side, and back view photos. Wearing tight-fitting clothes and exposing my body to both my own and Joe’s eyes felt like standing in front of a row of daggers — not quite touching me, but close enough that even the smallest movement could pierce and deflate any remaining sense of pride. Thankfully, Joe quietly helped set up the photo area and took the pictures without a single comment.

Then came Humiliation, ready to take its turn while we measured my body. The only tape measure I could find was marked in centimeters, which meant writing down big numbers. Converting to inches gave me smaller numbers, but they were still too big for comfort. The leg measurements were especially demoralizing — you’re supposed to measure 10 inches above the knee, but my upper legs are only about nine inches long. I already knew my legs were short, but somehow discovering how short hit differently.

Oh, and Shame and Humiliation really had their field day when I moved on to videoing myself doing squats from every angle — front, back, both sides. Thirty “sort-of” squats later, I had a crystal-clear picture (and four videos) of just how much work lies ahead.

But here’s the thing: once I pushed through every mortifying, terrifying step, I realized just how committed I am to my future success. I chose to put myself through it instead of saying “Hell no!” and crawling back into my delusional frame of mind — the one that thinks I’ll wake up tomorrow svelte and fit, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.

There’s something healing about facing reality and telling Shame and Humiliation that there’s no more room for them in my journey. I may not be leaping tall buildings yet, but at least I’m on my way.