Tuesday, October 8, 2024

Cold Rain of Judgment

I am going to frame the above saying to sit on my desk. As the oldest of five children, to parents stretched thin by my father's accident and my mother's return to the workforce, at ten years old I was helping to care for and make decisions for my siblings. Any wonder I grew up and joined the business world and took on similar roles?

From May 2016 through February 2017, a series of unfortunate events in my life meant I had to step back and examine how I could change me so I could curtail elevated levels of anxiety and be able to breathe. Meditation, better health habits, and quality time with Joe and close friends all helped me to gain perspective. I figured out that I did not have a responsibility to make suggestions when people came to me with their problems. I learned to listen and empathize. I learned to wait until I was asked for an idea.

I learned that sometimes the best gift we give is to listen without judgement. Sometimes that was incredibly difficult for me. Especially since the answer seemed obvious to me. I would keep silent and coach myself with the idea that a friend's situation was the same as letting my child make her own decisions and succeed or fail on her own. Was I always successful at stilling my advice? Heck no. I WAS trying though.

Had I had the framed saying above, I think I would have been more successful. I will keep working on me. Who knew that would be such a job when I got older?


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