Friday, February 16, 2024

Dealing with Grumpy


I woke up feeling a bit grumpy. The problem is that usually when I am grumpy, I do not know why. It is more a sense of everything is irritating me.

Today, I knew why. It was because I am sharing space in the mornings with my husband. You see I have a morning routine and it consists of indoor walking in our flat. One lap from the end of the kitchen area, through the living room, around both sides of the bed, and back to the kitchen is one hundred steps. I do twenty to twenty-five laps when I first get up in the morning. Joe was home sick on Wednesday and Thursday this week.

Wednesday morning, he sat on the couch to put on his shoes, so I waited to start walking until he put on his shoes. Except he was sitting there staring off into space.

Me: “Are you finished putting on your shoes?”

Joe: “Yes. Why?”

Me: “I walk in the morning, and you are blocking my pathway.”

Joe: “All you have to do is say something.”

Me: “Well, I figured once you had your shoes on you would get up and move around. You don’t usually sit and stare off into space.”

Joe moved to the table to eat his breakfast. The chair he chose was directly in my walking path. Three other chairs to choose from, he picks the one in my walking path.

Okay, so I modify my walk.

Similar annoying “being in my space” events occur on Thursday. This morning, I thought screw it I am NOT walking my laps, I am taking the morning off.

On our thirty-minute drive to Costco in Maple Grove today, we talked about my crankiness. He always says the same thing when I apologize for being cranky.

“Oh, I didn’t notice. Are you feeling cranky?” (This is not sarcasm; he really does not think I am ever cranky).

I then explain that when he officially retires at the end of the month, we will need to work out an arrangement to give me walking space in the mornings until it warms up outside. And, in his usual best husband manner, he proceeds to tell me that he can go upstairs and let me have the flat in the mornings to walk. Or he can sit with his iPad in our flat in a space that does not interfere with my walk.

He then says. “All you need to do is let me know what you need. I know that is hard for you. You don’t want to impose.”

And he is right. We both are so grateful for the almost 30 years (in late April) of this marriage that we do not want to take the other one for granted or make an ask that we might think is unreasonable. And yet, either of us would do anything for each other.

As usual, he is right and all I can think in my head is, “I am grumpy… and the problem is me.”

My mood lifted. 

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