Hold Your Horses!

Hold Your Horses! On the way back from Maple Grove today, not far from home, we drove through Greenfield. We were on Highway 10 which is also known as Woodland Trail which then becomes Rebecca Trail coming into Rockford. Today the drive was especially lovely as there was an entire woods of red-leafed trees. It was too far away to get a photograph that showed the true grandeur of the trees.

Highway 10 is undergoing road construction and had one lane closed off. While we were waiting for our turn to go, we were stopped right at the entrance to a horse ranch. The sign caught my eye!

According to their website, Hold Your Horses provides interventions that help their clients achieve wellness and increase the quality of their lives. They have a trained professional therapy team and trained equine partners to provide opportunities for skill development both on and off the horse. Individuals with physical, cognitive, or sensory impairments can benefit from their treatment strategy which consists of hippotherapy or equine facilitated psychotherapy.

Pretty cool place!

I especially like the name of the farm as I grew up hearing “hold your horses” from my parents and aunts and uncles whenever I was impatient. Seeing this sign today seemed like a gentle reminder today from the universe to be more patient with myself.

Another cool thing I saw today, while waiting for a stoplight to turn green, was this license plate ahead of me:

Pan is Megan’s dog. He loves walking with Joe every day. When Joe naps (like he is right now), Pan often naps as well:

My hip flexor issue is coming along nicely. It has healed to the point where all I can really do is continue my stretches, rest, and walk when I can and let time complete the healing process. An area where I need to be more patient with myself! 

Listening to the Quiet

We have had someplace to be every day this week. Today was a day of quiet! With rain on and off all day, Joe limited his daily walk to two and a half miles. I only left our flat to go upstairs for dinner. All my walking was done around our living quarters. While the scenery can get repetitious at least it’s dry!

I spent part of my afternoon on the phone with the gentleman who came out to inspect the roof earlier this week. I am learning how homeowner’s insurance works differently between California and Minnesota. The climate differences have an impact I never even considered. All this information will help Joe and me when we are ready to buy our house.

After dinner and her shower, Charlotte came to ask Grandpa to play Chinese Checkers. She looked around and said, “It’s so quiet here!”

I stopped and listened for a moment. It is quiet in our flat. I have taken this for granted. Listening to the quiet, I realized how peaceful it is to be surrounded by the quiet for part of a day. I have grown accustomed to background noises over the years. While the noise is often blocked from my conscious, it is still there nagging at my brain. Purposefully blocking background ‘noise’ has become a habit. I wonder if it will still be as quiet when we get our hearing aids?

I hope you have enjoyed some quiet in your day.

If you want to read about how silence benefits us, this is an informative article.

https://time.com/6210320/how-listening-to-silence-changes-our-brains/

I Can See Clearly Now

Head, shoulders, knees, and toes, knees, and toes.
And eyes and ears and mouth and nose.

A popular exercise song from childhood days, turns out to take on new meaning in our senior years.

Since last week we have covered the mouth (dental appts); shoulders, knees, and toes (chiropractor); ears (audiologist), head, knees, and toes (medical). No one has asked about my nose, so far.

Today we did eye exams. Both Joe and I had changes in our prescriptions. The Buffalo Eye Clinic doctor and the optician we saw were both excellent. The optician, Shannon, was a delight to work with on selecting my new glasses. While we were waiting for Joe’s eye exam to finish, Shannon and I spent time chatting.

We chatted about the town she lives in, Annandale, which is about 29 minutes from Rockford and is famous for having twenty-six lakes in a ten-mile radius. The town with a population of around 3,200 people works for her. Shannon moved from Colorado (less than one hundred people in the community she lived in) to Minnesota at age eleven. I am especially looking forward to checking out a restaurant/ haunted hotel she told me about – The Thayer. Both the hotel and the restaurant are on my list of “things to do” this next year.

The conversation with Shannon was enjoyable. She openly shared about her life. Her authenticity shines through. Frankly, given that her twenty-four-year-old son died three months ago, her light shines brightly. Her energy is positive. It does not come across as an act, though I would never fault her for putting on a ‘positive face’ at work. She told me that both friends and co-workers have provided amazing support.

Visiting, with Shannon was a treat for me. Thank you, universe for the 'heart to heart' visit with Shannon.

Megan and Jeremy are outside decorating for Halloween. Caleb and Charlotte are out of school for the rest of the week. Today is teacher training day and Thursday and Friday are a fall school break. When I asked Charlotte if she liked having a long weekend, she informed me, “I like home better. You can learn more things at home. You don’t need a school to learn.” She then went on to share, “Some babies are born already knowing everything,” I was surprised to learn this and really had no argument to present. It makes me curious how seven-year-old brains work…

I always enjoy my conversations with Charlotte. She is growing bolder in her approach to me. I have been letting her have the space as she needs to make a connection. Joe connects with both Charlotte and Caleb with the board games. Caleb and I connected within days of meeting on one of my first trips here. He is an extrovert, the oldest child, articulate, intelligent, and an avid hug giver.

Charlotte is more reserved. I think she may be an ambivert (introvert and extrovert). She is shy. She is very bright and funny. Last week at dinner I asked her if she enjoyed a trip she took with Caleb and his mom for boy scouts. Charlotte’s response, “I’d rather talk about my day at school.” That should have clued me in as to her thoughts about the boy scout trip (they had an overnight stay in a docked submarine).

I feel blessed to have this time with them. Before we know it, they are going to be grown and too busy to have time for us. This is why it is important to me to live in the moment.

 

Clean BIll of Health

Today was our first ever Medicare Wellness checkup. Joe and I met with the physician’s assistant (PA) and had a complete blood count (CBC) test. Both of us got our CBC results within about 6 hours and all our results are within normal range on all tests. The CBC was a non-fasting so the PA would have a baseline for our records on what our “normal’ lifestyle results look like.

We got a clean bill of health for today. My blood pressure, since retiring, has been very good. This confirms my belief that retirement was an excellent choice. I believe some stress is good for us – everything in moderation. I am grateful for meditation and breathing exercises that I do when I have occasional stress. The stress I was putting myself under before retirement was not healthy!

After our doctor’s visit we headed over to Subaru in Brooklyn Park to order our snow tires and wheels. We stopped by Dick’s and REI looking for mink oil for Joe’s new winter boots with no luck. I ended up ordering from Amazon. Then we stopped at Costco for our weekly shopping and to gas up the car. 

Gas is $3.25/gallon this week. The last time it was low was on July 18th when it was at $3.20/gallon. It has been costing between $3.40 and $4.10 when we've gone to fill up. The savings will help pay our co-pay on our hearing aids.

Yesterday, I cut back on my stretching exercises and found that my leg/hip feels better today. I walked through Costco without experiencing pain. I like when that happens – the no pain part.

Joe is out for his daily five mile walk with Pan. I am chilling with Ghost Whisperer Season 2 Episodes -17 through 20. I have found I enjoy binge watching series better if I only watch 3 or 4 max and then go off to watch a different series. Otherwise, the continual intensity makes me lose interest.

Not a lot happening here and I really, really like it that way!

I Hear You! (Or I Will As Soon As My Hearing Aids Arrive)

Joe and I went for comprehensive hearing tests today. Our Medicare plan encourages annual auditory, dental, eye, and wellness checks. Since we are new to the area, we wanted to establish a relationship with providers before we need to see someone in an emergency.

So yeah, we had hearing tests. Based on our answers during the interview phase, the audiologist expected Joe’s hearing to need the most help. Who knew? My hearing tested worse than Joe’s hearing in the lower ranges. I had to concentrate hard during the hearing test. I was worn out by the time the 30-minute test was over. I mean physically wrung out. I knew I had struggled with hearing during COVID since everyone I worked with wore masks, add to that the tone of the speaker’s voice and I had difficulty. I was asking people to repeat themselves a lot and I was rephrasing to make sure I had the correct information. It seems that if one is concentrating and hyper-focused during hearing it can wear the body down.

All this time I thought it was the emotional needs of my co-workers during COVID that was draining me. Pretty certain that played a part. It’s also possible it was compounded by how hard I was working at listening for understanding.

This situation also makes me wonder if the times I walked away from someone feeling drained, I was in fact tired from listening for context and understanding. In other words, it was not their energy draining my energy. It was my concentration on listening and hearing that were draining me.

Our insurance covers most of the hearing aid costs so it seems like a good time to get onboard. I am also grateful that technology has improved since my uncle and father-in-law purchased and wore the hearing aids. Chances are nobody will ever know I am wearing mine as my hair will cover them. The hearing aid we are getting is small and is classified as receiver in the ear. Also, the batteries can be charged (like my iPhone) nightly in about three hours and the battery will last up to sixteen hours a day. I also like that I can control the volume and other features with my phone and not try to adjust them manually while wearing them.

Both my uncle and father-in-law were changing hearing aid batteries every couple of days. Each time there was more chance that they would drop them (and they did). My uncle gave up on wearing his within a year because they were more trouble for him than not understanding what others were saying. Then there was the whole part where he wasn’t really interested in talking to anyone. Joe and I like visiting with people – it is important for us to hear what is being said.

Looking forward to hearing Charlotte’s soft voice better. Meanwhile, all the folks who have found themselves shouting so I can hear them – you are going to have to start talking in your indoor voice… 

Autumn Sunday in Minnesota

 The leaves continue to change colors and have begun dropping into yards. Yesterday morning, I noticed a beautiful orange leaf laying in Megan’s driveway. Reminded me of the times we would collect leaves, first when I was a child and later Megan, for school projects.

Megan snapped a photo of the backyard again:

I am into Season 3 of Only Murders in the Building. In Season 2 it was fun to see Shirley McLaine show up. This season is Meryl Streep. This cast appears to be having fun with each other. I had forgotten how much I love Steve Martin’s physical comedy.

We had steaks for dinner this evening, along with baked Brussel sprouts with onions, and a Caesar salad. Jeremy grilled the steaks for us when he came home from work. Megan took a photo of Jeremy’s steak. The yellow on top is garlic butter. It was very tasty!

It was a beautiful laid-back day. Before I retired, I worried that I would grow bored with life without a job. Silly me. I totally am not bored!

A Night Out!

This evening we ventured out to Cabela’s for Joe to buy some winter boots. We then decided to treat ourselves to dinner out as the rest of the family was going to the pumpkin patch this evening. Megan sent photos of the fun they were having – rain and all!

Jeremy, Charlotte, Caleb and Megan celebrating their third year at the pumpkin patch as a family. This will be their fourth year of trick or treating together on Halloween

Keep in mind Caleb is nine and Charlotte is seven - I am 5'2 1/2 " - they are catching up with me!

What a great spooky picture! Charlotte has her role down!

While they were getting muddy, we ended up at McGarry’s Irish Pub in Maple Plain about fifteen miles southwest of Cabela’s and only about ten miles south of Rockford. We got to see some more of the local countryside. As Joe said, with the trees losing leaves, we are seeing houses tucked away that we did not see during this past summer. In some places whole housing divisions have been out of view until now.

Dinner at McGarry’s was a great treat. We started by sharing jalapeno poppers which were wrapped in bacon. Joe is not a bacon fan so next time we will try something else, and I’ll wait for one of my bacon loving friends to visit before ordering again. They paired nicely with Joe’s Guiness and my Tequila Mule. Our first drinks since our trip to Oregon and California last month.

Our main courses were Short Rib Stroganoff (me) and a Reuben for Joe. We finished with Guinness Chocolate cake. I am looking forward to going back again to try some of their other dishes. The Stroganoff was served on pappardelle pasta – house made. I ate only half of my dinner so I could have room for the cake. The other half will be tomorrow’s lunch (or maybe breakfast).

Tomorrow we are planning a quiet day as we have a full week of appointments starting Monday morning.

Friday the 13th

Megan threw a surprise movie night party for Caleb and Charlotte in celebration of Friday the 13^th. We were invited to take part in the festivities which included Haunted Mansion movie, popcorn, root beer floats, and candy! The kids don’t normally get this much sugar! Charlotte hardly touched the candy.

Megan decorated with candles, streamers, a spooky looking cobweb, and fun little bowls and accessories. She took photos for the blog:

Popcorn in the Halloween plastic bowls (fifty cents each at Target or Walmart)

Megan served Caleb and Charlotte their candy in black ice cube trays. They liked the assortment of M&Ms and different types of candy corn.

It's difficult to read the sign - "You are something magic."

The big screen TV with battery operated candles and scary decorations on the table.

Friday and Saturday evenings are usually movie nights for the family. We join them occasionally – I am not good about sitting through an entire movie. The Haunted Mansion movie kept me thoroughly entertained and the kids seemed to enjoy it. Joe and Jeremy both fell asleep…

Evenings like this make me happy to be in a multigenerational household.

Dental Day

 

Pumpkin winner ofthe contest at our dental office

It was my turn in the dental chair today. The dental hygienist, Jenna, has a light touch. My teeth feel great. The dentist came in, looked over my mouth and declared me in fine teeth health and said he would see me next spring. Works for me!

My prior dentist was someone I went to even though the cleanings and exams felt like torture. I do not suffer from dental phobia as some members of my family do, but with that dentist I dreaded visits for a different reason. Every visit in the first 2 years was trying to upsell me on a service. Finally, I found the courage to tell the dentist to stop. For the next six years it would be, “Are you ready to replace those old fillings, yet?” And every time I’d respond, “They are not bothering me.”

I felt relief during today’s visit when this recommendation did not come up. I walked out of this visit feeling immensely pleased that these old teeth are serving me well. Both my parents and several of their siblings had gum disease. I put it down to a lack of available dental care. I take for granted that I have had some kind of dental insurance since I was twenty-one years old.

Growing up, I only recall two or three dental visits. In a family of seven, with no dental insurance, dental work was not in the budget. My sister got braces because it was medically necessary. She had extra teeth growing in the roof of her mouth that needed to be pulled and then braces installed to help the rest of her teeth align properly. If my younger brothers had braces, I don’t remember hearing about it as I left home at eighteen and moved to California.

Last night I enjoyed a visit with my niece, Renee, we talked virtually for over an hour. That was such a treat.

This afternoon, Charlotte came downstairs looking for me. This is a first. I was in the bedroom resting my hip. I heard Joe tell her. It’s okay if you go in to talk to her – she’ll be happy to see you. She shyly made her way to the side of the bed and proceeded to share that she had been drawing. She described in detail how she drew a stick figure. We discussed that for a bit and then we came out to the table and Pan did tricks for treats. Caleb joined us. Now the kids are playing hide and seek in our flat.

These are the moments I will miss after we move into our own place.

Adulting - Again...

Today I spent time talking to a company that repairs exteriors and roofs to get an inspection on Megan’s roof. To the best of our knowledge the roof is fine. The underwriters on Megan’s home insurance reached out through the agent to get a receipt for her 2023 roof replacement – except we never advised that the roof was replaced. It seems the broker reported the house as having a new roof. It doesn’t.

We have had two hailstorms since July, so the insurance company wants to have us inspect the roof for damage. The upside is that I talked to a pleasant person at the exterior company and got the scoop on roofing in Minnesota. That information will help us when we buy a home here.

I realized if I really wanted to work part-time, I could offer my services as a personal assistant to people with a need. Today, Megan had a need because her frustration level was super high over the agent’s error in reporting the roof as brand new. The agent wrote an email assigning blame to Megan and me when neither of us lied and told her we had a brand-new roof on the home. In talking to another insurance agent, I work with, he explained that the program used for quotes automatically sets the roof date to the current year and it must be manually changed.  So, we didn’t insert the data for the         quote – the agent did.

It will all work out as it is meant to work out. I know people make mistakes.

I have my own frustration points and could use some coaching/assistance as well. I know the chiropractor is pleased with my progress so far. However, I paid the price for walking a mile, as advised, and today my leg was achy, and I felt like someone had beat me. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Today I took it easy, keeping up on the stretches, the moist heat, and using my new massage cane for the trigger point on my left hip area. I am learning useful information about therapy for my hip flexor. I am also TIRED of it and want to be 100% healed and able to do anything I want when I want. That sounds unreasonable even to me.

I am looking forward to a virtual chat with my niece, Renee, this evening!

Dentist, Shopping, and a Party to Look Forward To

Joe and I got our day off to an early start with an 8:00am dental appointment for Joe. My appointment is this Thursday. Our appointments are for establishing as new clients and for our semi-annual cleaning and check-up. Joe asked me to go along in case there were any snafus with our new insurance. It all went well.

While I was in the waiting room a woman came in with a boy of about ten. After he went back to see the dentist, she sat scribbling words onto a white business letter size envelope. As she wrote, I wondered if she was writing a poem. Or perhaps her grocery list, the plot for a novel, a To-Do list? I was almost inclined to ask her. I didn’t.

Equally I wondered about her relationship to the boy. Was he, her son? Grandson? Nephew? Was she, his Nanny? Maybe an Aunt?

Meanwhile when I wasn’t thinking about her, I was marveling at the dentist’s office. I took pictures so you can see what I saw. The décor was warm and inviting. The waiting room had comfortable chairs and plenty of floor space, so it did not feel cramped even when there were about five patrons at one point. People did not wait long to be called back to the treatment rooms.

I found myself smiling at the fall decorations on the reception counter. I was amused that I was smiling over decorations. Then I realized there was a sign on the counter that read “Smile.” I guess my subconscious saw the sign first. I especially liked the curved ceiling above the reception counter. It dawned on me that I see few curves in décor. I like curves. They soften the world.

From the dentist’s office (here in Rockford) we drove about a mile to the other end of Rockford to Tractor Supply. Joe wanted my opinion on a winter coat he had seen on sale there. After we bought the coat, we headed to Maple Grove to do our Costco and Cub shopping for this week.

By the time we got home from our shopping it was 12:30 pm. We put groceries away, ate lunch, and then I worked on questionnaires for our medical appointments next week. Again, nothing wrong – our appointments are annual physicals.

Time got away from me what with stretches, moist heating pad sessions, and a new treatment where I lay on a small hard spiky ball for my left hip for five minutes twice a day. The first time I was lying on the floor with the small ball beneath me, Megan came down to talk to me. She said when she got to the bottom of the stairs and saw me lying on the floor, she almost had a heart attack thinking I was dead.

Five minutes is a long time! While it is my right hip flexor that I am working on “fixing” I have a hard muscle on the left that needs to be worked out. I don’t feel it when I walk – only during the times I am being adjusted at the chiropractor.

I have got to tell you all these things I am doing are working. Yet, today I experienced more pain than I did yesterday. I recall a friend telling me that he belongs to a pain management support group that talked about how pain can be a sign of healing. The body is working its magic. I find though that the day speeds by in the 30-45 minutes between sessions of one self-care therapy or another.

This evening I cooked dinner. We had New York steak, parmesan fettucine, and a kale and cabbage salad. There was leftover steak and fettucine – enough for lunch tomorrow. Megan and Jeremy were off watching Caleb practice football. Caleb may even have had a scrimmage or a game.

Now the dishes are done, and I am going to try to watch a bit of Ghost Whisperer on Hulu. I saw where Moonlighting with Cybil Shepard and Bruce Willis is now available on Hulu. I tried to watch the pilot and found it ponderous. I will have to try to watch it when I’m in a different mindset. I loved the show when it originally aired.

Megan sent us an invitation to a Friday the 13^th party in their living room at 8:00 pm on Friday. They will have some pre-Halloween candy goodies and be watching Haunted Mansion. Sounds fun!!

Do you have something fun you are looking forward to this week?

 

Movement

Other than a Chiropractor appointment today it was another day of doing stretches and walking to improve my hip flexor. The prognosis is excellent as I am responding well to treatment. At this point it is all up to me for improvement. Keeping up with the stretches, using moist heat compresses, and walking a mile a day.

Joe has been walking a lot lately. It helps him to feel his best. Most days he does between five and seven miles. Today he walked ten miles.

Looking forward to a trip to Costco tomorrow. Got to get our jollies where we can!

Only Serenity in the Building

In between stretches for my hip, I helped Joe update his resume, references, and cover letter for a job he is applying for here in Rockford. I also managed to watch Season 1 of Only Murders In the Building.

I have seen interviews with Steve Martin and Martin Short about the show and had it on my list to watch. I had a Hulu connection so watched it. I was impressed with Selena Gomez’s role along with everyone in the show. I love the twists and turns. My favorite scene though is of Steve Martin in the elevator after having been poisoned (Spoiler alert?).

Yesterday was a serene Saturday and likewise for Sunday. I am blessed to have so many days that feel stress-free after years of stress. I recognize much of the stress was self-induced and I’m grateful for the last six years of meditation sessions which helped me to weed through what was real and what I was creating in my mind.

We are enjoying the cooler weather these days. Megan sent over two photos of her backyard to show that the leaves are continuing to change colors. 

Serene Saturday

Quiet day here. I am limited on stair trips so Joe, aka Laundry Fairy, did the stair trips and brought me dry laundry to fold. I did manage to mop our floors today. Then it was nap and show time. Watched a few episodes of Ghost Whisperer.

Jeremy and Megan are gone to the Gophers football game against Michigan. Joe is completing an online job application form for a local hardware store and grumbling about HR and software programmers.

The special Bark Box I ordered through Charlotte’s girl scout fall fundraiser sale arrived this afternoon. Pan and Rufio were the recipients of a Berry Trios snack, now they are laying at my feet in case I should generously give them another snack. Neither one is interested in the squeaky beret that came in the box.

There is a certain loveliness to a day that’s highlight is the Bark Box. A day where the only goal is to relax and enjoy the peacefulness. The introvert in me enjoys the alone time. Joe is the perfect companion for an introvert. He recently moved his computer area from the living room area to the space entrance so he can get better internet reception. He wears headphones while watching YouTube videos (machining, welding, how to stuff) or a movie. The space he is occupying is directly in my line of vision when I look up from my laptop space. It is truly a welcome sight. 

Checking In and Football

We decided not to tour the house with 4+ acres of land and propane heating. After sleeping on the idea, we decided it wouldn’t be in our best interests in the long term.

I went to the chiropractor today and learned that my hip flexor issue is severe. I am armed with a couple of exercises I am doing every thirty minutes to help it heal. The worst news was that it’s possible I may not be able to walk during the healing process – it could get worse before it gets better. One day at a time. After today’s treatment I am a bit tender, the shooting pains have receded for which I am grateful.

Caleb started practicing tackle football two days a week. It is a try-out to see if he wants to play next year when he is in fifth grade. He has attended three practices now and likes learning techniques and plays. Jeremy says he is picking up on the plays quickly. Jeremy took photos for us at last night’s practice. Caleb is wearing a long sleeve red t-shirt under his uniform.

Last night when he was suiting up for practice, we all got to check out his gear. It is comforting to see how much padding these kids are wearing. The mouth guard attached to the helmet is impressive.

Football was one sport Megan never played. No girl's leagues in our communities. She played baseball and soccer on girls’ teams until she was in 4th grade when she played baseball on a team of boys and girls (she was one of two girls). In 5th grade she played soccer on a boys’ team. The only girl in our community to do so at the time. Then we moved to Egypt for her 6th grade year where she played baseball (only girl on the team) and soccer (girls’ team) at her school. When we returned to Woodland for her 7th grade year she asked to try out for the boys junior high team and was told no. Thus ending her ball career - she had no desire to play softball.

Megan, Jeremy, Caleb, and Charlotte are huge Minnesota Gopher fans. Last night at dinner, Charlotte asked if she could have a birthday cake this year instead of cupcakes. She would like the frosting and cake to be the Gopher’s colors. Her birthday is in mid-January so we will see if that happens.

Most of today, I have been reading either my current book (Arcadia by Lauren Groff) or online news, with occasional check-ins on Facebook to see what other people do during the day when they are not at work.

Touring Homes

We are not quite ready to purchase a house; however, one came up that looked promising, so we called an agent and went to look at it today. It turned out to be smaller than anticipated so I was glad to have toured it. I think now I’ll have a better idea of the space in multi-level houses that are common here.

We looked at two other homes. The first was built in 1991, the second in 2001, and the third just built. I had difficulty because none of the homes gave me a warm feeling. They seemed sterile somehow. Houses # 1 and #2 had some furnishings, while three had just finished construction and was not a model home – no furniture. And even though the square footage of all three was more than our Woodland home – they felt smaller.

All three homes were well within our proposed price range to the realtor.

The house Joe and I have had our eye on for several weeks is a bit higher than we want to spend. The price just dropped. A 3000 square feet rambler style home, with a finished basement that is built out, it sits on a little over 4 acres of land. The basement has its own kitchen, living area, bedroom, and bathroom. It is owned by an elderly woman who is ready to downsize. It looks inviting in the photos. My thought is I’ll either rule it out because it doesn’t give me warm fuzzies or I’ll fall in love with it. If I fall in love with it, I will need to figure out if the seller is willing to wait 4-6 months. If there are no warm fuzzies I can move on without memorializing it as “the perfect house that got away.”

I also must check further into the cost of propane for the heating. When I was growing up in Ohio, propane costs seemed like the biggest expense in the wintertime. That right there may be a deal breaker for us.

Other than house tours, I spent the day reading up on propane, doing my exercise routine every thirty minutes, reading a novel, and watching one episode of Friends.

The pain in my thigh came back this afternoon. I have another chiropractic appointment tomorrow morning and am looking forward to it. I went 24 hours with minimal pain. The worst pain was this afternoon as I was going up the stairs for dinner. I was frozen on the steps for about five minutes as the waves of pain emanated in my right thigh. The pain finally receded enough I could finish the 4 stair steps up to the main living floor. I was highly motivated to get to the dinner table because we were having one of my very favorite meals – hot dogs!

 

Chiropractor Visit, Goodbye Substitute Teaching, and Loving Retirement

 

Joe makes friends with the Chirporactor's dog. Immediately!

At some point on our recent trip, I developed a sharp shooting pain in my right thigh. As a result, I have not been able to walk my steps goal everyday which makes me feel grumpy. Today, I saw a chiropractor and am so happy that he identified a hip flexor issue. I had a 20-minute electrical treatment with a hot pad and an adjustment. Armed with an exercise that I am doing every thirty minutes during waking hours, I am feeling tons better.

I am a bit achy, but I have not had the sharp pain I was feeling before the visit. The chiropractor said the car trip was partially responsible and that my walking so much prior to the recent trip may also have contributed. We are getting me healed and then I can return to my daily walking with the understanding that I will slow down by adding 100 steps a week instead of per day to my goal. The chiropractor I saw today explained that the reason one should do the stretches recommended is because the treatment by a chiropractor usually lasts about 1 ½ hours before the body wants to return to the state it was in.

It appears that I was also walking with a slight forward bent. That was my body and brain’s way of compensating for the pain. So, I am standing tall now and I love the feeling – I think I regained my ½” of my 5’ 2 ½” height.

The other good thing I did for myself today was to call Teachers on Call and let them know I wanted to be removed from their substitution list. When they asked me if I just didn’t want to work with them, I explained that it wasn’t them. It was me. I went over my concerns and anxiety around all the rules for student engagement and how fearful I was that I would accidentally do or say something that would cause problems for Teachers on Call and for me. The woman I talked to said she understood and would have my name removed from their records by Monday.

For now, I am going to work on healing, physically, and improving my overall stamina. From there I can decide if I want to find a volunteer position in our community. I have not been bored in retirement. Then again, I am not sure I’ve had time to be bored. Between getting ready for the move to Minnesota, our three road trips this year, and getting settled into our temporary living quarters, I haven’t had long stretches of time to fill. I sure do like reading a book or watching a show whenever I want. I also like the freedom I have when booking appointments for self-care. No more trying to balance a work life with my personal life. It is very freeing!

Getting out of bed in the morning when I want, taking a nap whenever, and going to bed later than 8:30pm are all great as well. If I wake up in the middle of the night and want to read until I fall back asleep I do it without worrying that I won’t be rested enough in the morning.

Going into retirement, I wasn’t sure how it would work out for me. I have worked for so long and being a creature of habit, I thought I’d miss working. Nope. Not one bit. Retirement 1, Employment 0.

Getting Back in Our Routine...

A few more photos of leaves changing colors in Rockford. Minnesota area. The colors are not as vibrant as they were in Southern Minnesota when we were coming home from California last week. I’ll keep my eye out for other opportunities though.

Today was our shopping day which included Costco and Cub, with a side-trip to the Subaru dealership in Brooklyn Park about 6 miles east of Buffalo. We needed new windshield wipers. Auto Zone had an off brand that they would sell us for $35.00 each, which would need to be modified. Subaru sells the wipers we need, without a need for modification, at $23.00 each. We are also looking at winter tires. We could get them at Costco and then must buy wheels from Discount for a total of $1050.00. Subaru will get us the tires and wheels for $1000.00.  This surprised me as I have always thought dealerships were more expensive. Maybe it’s just the labor costs that are higher.

My vaccines from Monday are doing their job! Both injection sites are warm to the tough, a tad bit swollen, and sore. As my scientist friends would say, “It’s working!”

(Top is flu; bottom is COVID)

Tonight, we are off to attend a Homeowner’s Association meeting for Megan as she has her Brownie Troop Meeting at the same time. We are going to listen and report back to her.

 

Regret or Survival? A Pondering...

I love the season Fall (as opposed to the action of falling). I have not had a chance to get photos of the leaves changing colors here. The trees in Megan’s yard have started to change so I snapped a photo. Tomorrow we are going to Buffalo to Costco, and I hope to get one or two photos.

A few weeks back the following meme showed up on Facebook:

Earlier this year I may have agreed with this sentiment. Now, though I have come to understand that for some people talking to their family members is more toxic than regret can ever be. For some people their emotional survival comes at the cost of cutting ties to people who either created the toxicity or to other family members who remind them of the trauma. Having heard several stories from people who are estranged from their family members, I get it.

Their pain, in some cases thirty, forty, fifty, and even sixty years old, is not going to be healed by reconciliation. Especially when the perpetrators take no responsibility for their own actions. Or the perpetrators have died, and yet their voice lives on in the mind of the recipient.

All of this to say that I have had my eyes opened to why some people cut family ties. I also have learned how grateful I am for my parents and siblings. We had some tough years, financially, after my father’s accident. I have never felt like I wanted to be in another family, nor have I wanted to stop seeing my brothers. I love them. I love my parents and sister who have died.

We don’t all see eye-to-eye. This is not about shred values or shared beliefs. It is about a parent or sibling having unmet expectations of another child in the family. About comparing that child to another, “Why can’t you be like your brother?”

“Why are you so sensitive?”

“You need to be more like ___________ (fill in the blank)”

In one case a friend was told, "Why are you so tall? Why can't you be petite like (the name of another family member)?" While that sounds outrageous to us as adults. To a child it can be devastating. 

Any comments that set children up as competition to each other in terms of personality, looks, or physical ability should stick in the throat of the speaker.

I agree we should not wait until people die to try to reconcile if reconciliation is what we want. Living in the moment and having tough conversations that make us feel vulnerable is important if we want to repair a relationship. It’s a two-way street though. The other person must be vulnerable enough to listen and empathize with the estranged sibling’s worldview.

That engagement cannot include comments like, “You need to just get over it.”

“Well, I agreed with what was said to you. You should be more like so and so.”

And yet. That is exactly what people want to do in defending another family members’ meanness.

 I know I made mistakes as a parent. Fortunately, my child is open to talking with me about those mistakes. That is how healing starts. She is so much braver than most people I know. 

Retirement on Sundays

 Today was Flu and COVID vaccine day for Joe and me. All done with that for a bit!

Other than getting vaccines we had a peaceful Sunday. Reading and watching some Netflix and Apple TV. Joe is finishing up the last season (Season 3) of Ted Lasso. I chose to watch the movie Reptile on Netflix.

One benefit of Sundays, after retirement, is that we don’t need to go to work on Monday. It has taken some getting used to; however, Joe and I are troopers when it comes to trying new things. Retirement is one of the best “new” things I have ever done.

The internet is down this evening, so I am going to post this using my iPhone hotspot and call it an evening.